an angry woman is a angry woman.

An angry woman is an angry woman.

Big F***! me and his romance are really short-lived. i dunno why, i kept dissing off at such minor matters, yet, he's leaving me to isolate. big F***. i'm realli angry. why doesnt he shower me love? why??? why is it that his fren fell "outta love" and he needs to accompany him? why does his gf need his love yet he gives none?

why is he not beside me whenever i nid him? why issit that i have to stick to him like f***? why cant i have some self-esteem? do i have no shame at all? do i even need him to be ard me when he's not? do i have to question myself whether i love him at all? i dun understand why i'm feeling like this rite now.

thing is that: I DONT NEED YOU TO BE RIGHT BESIDE ME.
but i need u to be there with me, mentally. cant i just have that? it feels just as if i'm alone, stranded, dead. why am i still with u? i dunnoe. frens, do not ask me what's happening(though i "want" u to ask), cuz u will noe. but why is he not even asking me? why is he always thinking that i'm kicking a big fuss outta nothing? i throw my temper ard cuz i need attention from u, u blardy idiot! cant u read me? i know we're together for a very long time already, but u still dun understand me.

"You need to shower women love; not understand her. You need to understand men, and not love 'em."

right, right. and so the saying goes. u dun have to understand me. just love me. but u realli gave me none.

jl said smth last night that woke me up. but i dun care. "maybe he's had his time shared b/w u and his frens, it's just that u cant see. and u thought he's not." big fark. but why did i devote all my time to him?! why is he leaving me alone?! why am i being such a bitch to him?!

i realli ponder sometimes, if we dint get together at the very beginning... ... ...

I'll miss and still love you.

Hi, it's me...

many things happened when i dint blog for like the trillionth year. my beloved grandma passed on, i got scolded by wilful customers, etc. it's a relieve for granny that she passed away, but it's pain to all of us whom loved her so dearly. she's battled the illness since last oct, if u'd followed up my blog and if u're a faithful reader of mine. she's so nice to everyone; amiable and friendly. it's really a waste not to have her ard. i will always remember vividly how she'll chuck wads of cash into my small hands everytime she'd see me... and she'll always be the one fitting the bill whenever we go out.

but i guess, she's living great in her piece of heaven, i'd dreamt of her. with a rainbow ard her. my parents said this is good omen.

as for my job, it's a relieve as well, that i've finished the contract and got my pay. i wouldnt want to deal with more unreasonable parents who're damn hard-up for some photo-taking shit. i've wiped my ass off it, and wouldnt want to touch that kinda job for a miserable pay anymore.

and for studies wise, i've been lagged by a week as i've skipped skool for my grandma's funeral, but luckily for me, i think that tutorials helped a hell lot. but sadly, i'm with 2 of my present classmate for the project, which sucks like hell. am thankful for the both of them, but hates it when i cant get paired up with my gal frens. arrgh.

things have been running quite smoothly('cept for my grandma's death)...
i spent my new year with my baby, and i enjoyed it. well, i'm dreading to say those, but still, i seldom share my happiness but i'm gonna give it a try now. i used to think whenever i share my happiness, it's always short-lived and cursed. but hell. i'm trying it now. i'm not showing-off, btw, if u THOUGHT i was. no, i'm not. lol.

the Tsunami's hit the shores of many asian beaches, sending tens of thousands of innocent ppl to their lil piece of heaven. i hope they get the best up there, and hopefully, there would be no more of such disasters anymore. it's just so saddening to hear the news everyday from now, the presenter's telling us the number of those whom passed away from the fatallic waves. and i hope that families of the deceased will grow stronger and independent, which are partly what i'm trying to achieve now.

still, i wanna be thankful that everyone else is still with me, and i'll try to grow up and out.
Taufiq's quote, as of what i wanna say to end these off : i love you all!