Dissin' Off.

i dunno why. but after i've read up a novel, i've been realising that i'm snapping so much often like the lead female in the story.

i snap up at the smallest irritating molecule, killing the happiness i had in me before.
the happiness is always short-lived and i really have a low tolerance threshold to start with.

i just couldnt think that my parents can be sooooo biased over their kids, and this is driving me crazy. mayb u dun like reading my posts cuz they're always filled with anger and sorrow, and never happy. but this is my life. i ought to search for a new one, drive up my patience level and tolerance, if not, i'll always be the unhappy one.

they say that parents WILL be biased. like the fingers on our hands? they're not equal. some short, some long. just like parents treating kids. some with high respect, but some with really low-loving ratings.

my parents expect me to do the chores in the house, claiming that they're tired and that they should take a rest. i know that working is a chore, and tiring event. but then again, why do they expect me to do it, but not my siblings? i wonder if they want me to tag along with them wherever they go is cuz they cant get my brothers to go with them?

should i not caare abt them? should i ignore them? i feel so stuffed in this house, i need a breather sometimes. but my mom is constantly breathing down my neck by what i should do to the house to contribute the least.

and that IS really getting on my nerves. why do they even not ask my brothers to do it? why do they go out and party and my parents feel it's okay for them? why do i go out and yet they think i'm wasting the limited resources, in this case, it's the money.

i dun see the reason why i'm being treated so indifferently here.
just because imma girl, that doesnt explain anything. i DO help out, yet they expect more than just that.

i dunno what to do else, i need to seek refuge from one. i need a brain-reader, and see what they really want. do they not want me? or do they just want to have a free maid in the house?

this is childish, but that's how i feel. regardless of what u feel, that's how i feel.

tell me that my parents love me. cuz i dont feel so.