Just For Fun. No offence to all Takeshi Kaneshiro's Fans...

Ka Cha!
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Hey, handsome! you're taking my photo?? Well, take more! i pose k? nah nah! (buay pai seh)

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"Err, you're talking to me? are u blind or smth? i'm taking THAT girl behind u. dont anyhow assume lar. and get away from my sight pls."
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hmmph! (tolerate) nvm... u so handsome, take lar... take more of my photos... can keep as souvenirs what...
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"why. do u want to leave? i'm warning u, before i call the guards."
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no. -smug- i'm not leaving.
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"fine. i'll call the guards."
"now, do u want to leave?"
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grrr. okay, okay. but must you really do this? take just one more photo of mine lar...
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"Arrghs!!! Go AWAY!!!"

-shocked- alright!!!
but before i go, can u promise me and my friends,
you see, my fren has a huge crush on u, and even when taking photos, she imagine that she's hugging u!
and we'll organize a BBQ soon, and there'll be lots of good food!
how? game on coming?
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"what? do u suppose i'm a glutton? "

"i maintain my weight by drinking a LOT of water. i repeat, A LOT of water. ."
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"aiya, fine lar. dont be so stuck up can. dont go den dont go. it's not like she'll die from not seeing u. . we also drink water one lor." - says siu li.

"Arrrrrrghs!! stop bothering me! leave and i may consider not retrieving my bow and shoot u! "

"SEEEEE!!!! my girl left! and i'm pissed."
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"But! not to worry. i still have my charms with me. see how i win her back! u'll be in awe."

"i flash my smile, and she's hooked."

" And you, dont ever come back and tell ppl tat u've talk to me before. .
Understand? now, clear before i do anything drastic. "
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noted. sobs. but, i ask the last time, do u want a photo of mine? -batters eyelashes-
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" fine. fine! i leave!" -scrambles for life-

Righteous.

That's what i want and what Daryl(the psychic) said in the movie, Just like Heaven.

much was anticipated for my birthday, but i just ruined everything. i chose to let jealousy lead my nose, and i absently followed, but unwillingly accepting the fate i have now.

on 15th nov, my family decided to dine together, steamboat and everything, at home. and i got ridiculously quiet during the dinner, i dint noe what's gotten into me. prolly was my pms. and dad shelled a big-BIG prawn for me and placed it into my bowl. i dint noe why, i just kept quiet. i would usually be ecstatic, and yelled "thank you". but not then. after 2 mins, i returned the poor thing to dad's plate, and said so nonchalantly that i dint want it.

i supposed he got angry as well, and he left me out. he asked, so nonchalantly too, whether my bros are full.

after that, several incidents happened that tells me he aint very happy with me. and it left me without my sanity.

then i went out on both days, the eve, and the day of my birthday.

on 16th, went out with my girlfriends. was jumpy abt the meeting. really. but things were like, tearing apart. i cant stand it when we have seriously lesser common topics to converse in, and pretending that we're still very close and nice to each other. 7 of us went out, and unquestionably, one has to be by herself sometime. and not this one.

i dunno why. but i felt that she was pretentious. i mean, search me. she's just not what i think she's used to be. maybe we(read: refers to ppl, in general) just retained those pretty memories in our minds, that when we grow, the ugly ones tend to be thrown off. but they're(uglier ones) coming back again, refreshing my memory of the pure, ignorant times that we'd had, and contemplating the angst of the bad ones, too.

different. it's like, poles apart from the sweet memories that i'd had.

haiz. maybe i just havent grow up and mature and stop getting angry.

on thursday, i went out with her. went to watch the movie, just like heaven.

and again, fury's been sitting on my nose, too. she's kinda busy with her cellular when we're at the movie, and this was driving me crazy. of course, i'd like to comment about her and her stuff, face-to-face, and i guess i did it, but definitely, evading some other things that i tot may hurt her. i dont think i'm happy with what she's doing, but she neednt cared more of what i'm feeling. i mean, that's her life. i'm in no way to be standing at it and telling her what to do. i just hoped whatever she's doing, she enjoys it and gave serious thoughts about it. mayb it's no big deal to her, but i have no reason to get so uptight, but i just aint "loving it".

mayb i really shouldnt comment more. i guess each and every one of us just thinks what's best for them and does it. i mean, after posting this, she noes that i'm unhappy, but hell, i just want YOU to noe i'm not throwing my usual stupid tantrums.

and i think i wont mention names, cuz i dont think there's a need to. it's obvious.

i dunno it's her or me. haiz. big chance, could be me. i'm just gnashing my teeth, so tight, i need fake dentures soon.

i sat on the MRT, perpetually looking at my watch, afraid that the minutes-hand is not going to cross over to 12 soon, and the date skipping to "18". because if it does, i have no chance to rectify the moods i have on my birthday. but it did. my birthday just ended like that. i wasnt happy at all. really.

lots of ppl wished me happy birthday. i thanked them, but i'm not happy.

i have to do some soul-searching, and stop getting unhappy at the small little things that happen.

but the issue is, am i able to?

i'll try.

lycos just terminated my account. to no wish of mine. i think it's prolly cuz i uploaded some songs cussin'. but it's the song, not me, cussin'.



oh! and i became conscious that, i'm getting more and more hypocritical.



now, eradicate me, please.

=) i'm gay.

dont get me wrong. i'm a pure lady, who adores men to the max. i'm gay because, i'm happy!

went out today with jeannie, jinling and me. well, we've set up this club together, consisting of the three of us, called the "Ni Wo Ta club"... answering ur query(those non-chinese), "ni wo ta" means(loosely translated) you me her. LOL.

why call ourselves that? simple. it seems like we guys are drifting apart with our long-time frens. well, two of them, to be exact. they both are attached, and seemed far too busy to go out with us. and unenthusiastic too. prolly we(ni wo ta) are not as intresting as their boyfriends. -yawns- sad.

alright. return to the essence of my post. we went to plaza singapura to ate our lunch, which is the pizza that's been furiously hitting the commercials on the tv like no one's business. it was much anticipated, but we dint really fancy it. dunno why, prolly because no one's hungry, and that the food might really not taste pretty.

then, we took neo-prints! it costs us 3.30 each... expensive right?
somemore in the end, the pix wasnt those with what we'd chosed. sigh. this is a preview of it...
den we(me and jl) bought a top at 16bucks... cheap right... from ebase... i like it a lot...

and den, we ttrotted our way to orchard, and stationed at the OG for very long time... and dorothy perkins was having a sale, and of course, we have to zoom right in there...

ended up, we went hmv... nothing much to see, cuz it was all for youngsters and those who'd hyperventilated themselves and did nothing but ventilate(gist, is that they dont eat). lol. okie lar okie lar. i'm fat, okay?

hahas. and well, a note to end this, i truly miss my poly galfrens... hais... i wish to see them soon! =( and i've got a wish: to watch Just Like Heaven! -soon!-

Attachment. Period.

My fury is raging. everyone and everything seems to be driving me crazy. an amiss statement/question sets my frame of mind to combustion.

why.

why.

why.

yeah. u've guessed it. i've skipped the primrose oil capsules.

why?

u're so smart. the answer: no time. no remembrance. no prizes for u, though. neh ni neh ni pu pu.

=p.

aiya, sometimes must act cute mah, to mitigate tension in me. u noe.

and oh, attachment is... erm. quite alright. the colleagues, well, effectively, i'm only talking to one or two. lol. quite a lot already, can. i'm already taking a big stride in my life. hahhas.

my company is in tamp, and it takes me a great deal to travel there, u noe. i've to wake up at blardy 6.15. yaya, i mean, it's considered late to some of u. but do u have any idea, to be able to wake up later than ur peers before and now, having to wake up earlier than most ppl now just the thought makes me shudder.

btw, i'm meeting joyln tmr. hehes. we shall make meeting be our weekly affair. nothing indecent though. lol.

oh, and yeah. this week, at ard 6+ in the evening, loads of ppl clad in suits are taking the MRT from tanah merah interchange. heard from jinling that there might be an exchange program going on... and try to speculate this scene. loads of pretty boy ang mohs and asians are there too! -hurr hurr- hey, pretty, here i come! =x

yah, the usual. attachment is taking up like so much of my time, that i'm afraid me and him are really, drifting apart. communication breakdown, everything.

dont say i dint warn u.

nah! here's the pix we took last thurs over at the esplanade...


(psss... Look at the view behind us! yeepii!)






and today, with jinling:

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-yawns- i'm going to be dormant in 3 secs.

zapped!

Angst is almost over. =)

I tell u, evening primrose oil capsules does help. in a way.

it sorta like, pushes my pms to the bottom of the pit.

which is a good thing.

learning how to curb my anger, anxiety, and angst is a very difficult task for me. and i realised that, once i keep my mouth shut, i suppose it can stop any inevitables to being evitable.

tmr i'm going to bf's house. he's sick. feverish. and i'll prolly study there tmr. well, what's there to do in his house, just staring at his mom and prolly the four faces of wall. shoot me.

=)

oh yeah, me and jinling went out on 14.09.2005, and we took a plenty of pix! well, this is the scenario:

we underwent this secret passage way that led us to the early 40-50's... and before we swooshed over, we quickly leashed out our phones and took these pix...




we finally reached the place, and damn! it was smelly! the coolie whom we chanced upon was carrying this heavy bag in his hands, and from his expressions, i noe he found it smelly too! look at his frowning eyebrows!



i den went to demand the "dirty matter" to the ang moh in charge. seems like i'm not the only one who's unhappy bt that matter. looks who's with me:


well, i guess the ang moh just wouldnt take it in his stride. i tried to use my "beauty tricks" this time...


but he still wouldnt budge! well, it's jinling's turn to use her tricks...
luckily, this malay man was convinced that jl could make the ang moh turn soft, and seemed pretty happy of his decision, and requested that jl take a pic before helping us tell the ang moh abt the "dirty matter".


and then, he even asked for jl's hands for a dance!

and look! that coolie on the extreme left seemed pretty happy now that the vicinity is perfume nice now! isnt that cool?

since our moods were so uplifted as we'd helped the poor fellow "clear the air", we leashed out our phones again, and took this pic:


and we'd realised a small ball of spectrum of light is heading behind us... and it's getting bigger...


and this is the last pic that we took before boarding onto that big machine(behind us) and came back into reality. hahas. shoot me.

I'm dissing!

I dunno why. but i'm angry. this belated pms hits me at the wrong time.

my period is gone, yet my pms is back. it's trying to stay, i realise. i ignored it a few times, but to no avail. it seems to me that it's even stronger than my will-power.

i'm angry with my "fren", i'm angry with my dearest, i'm angry with my family, i'm angry with myself. what am i supposed to do, to get rid of the demon from me?

oh, and btw, i saw Kelvin that time near my sch! he's... erm, shorter than most of us thought he'd be(okay, mayb only i thought he was quite tall)... and he was having this walking stick in his hand, and mind u, he's alone. i'm wondering if he could partially see things, or issit that his 23 years has led him to be used to what he has. i'm not doubting what he has, but i'm just curious. cuz if he's partially blind, i suppose he could do more things, like, dance? arhs. shag me.

and finally, the project and comm skills' common test are over. it's so passe now to mention "Communication Skills" or "oh no... our project still cant work... how?"!

i'm glad everything is over. and i wish, that my pms will be gone as well.

and it seems like, it's not. cuz, i'm still not very over with the thought of my "fren". every thought of her disses me off. and i'm sick of it, cuz i keep thinking bout it. arrghs.

and i'll try not to cuss online. lol.

but a little caution to you guys reading this, fuck off from me.

i said i'll TRY.

You're my superstar. =)

i admire the smoothness your vocal sounds, i admire your courage, i admire the way ur eyes "light" up with sparks. and all in all, i admire u. you're my superstar, kelvin tan wei lian.

if u happen to realise, i've been starting to root for kelvin tan since the day Project Superstar had begin showing. he's managed, without fail, to make me cry for every episodes he's in.

"It would be degrading him if it's said that we vote for him because we sympathise him" - one tv source.

it's very true. think abt it. he has a normal family, with fully-abled kins, yet, he's the only misfortunate one, with one disability - he's lost the ability to see. and it's definitely not his fault. the path he took was a long and narrow one. he had went through massive obstacles before coming to this road name "Stardom". it wasnt fair for him, when ppl said that his votes are all sympathy votes, even if he doesnt sing as well as the other contestants.

he has no teacher. no special trainings. nothing.

he started with zero. but bagged a million.

he wept. and i did too.

i'm just so proud that he won, and i'll definitely support him, by purchasing his cd.

and i'm happy for Kelly Poon, too. for, she's also a winner in my heart.

Kelvin Tan Wei Lian, You're The One.

Missing and Loving You

Hmmm. Bad news. my grandpa just passed away. This is the second time i'd lost a beloved kin within a year. But, well, at least he can accompany my grandma frm now. they wont be separated anymore. The way i see grandpa suffering from the pain, it's consolling that he'd left us for the better. He would be able to live better up there, with the two houses we'd burnt for them.


I miss you, and love you, too. I really DO.

and now, i'm piled with the load that the school is giving me. the project needs to be done, and i really shouldnt have blogged at the first place. but den again, i'm just giving excuses for myself. i'll do it once i get the software from sharon.

it's been an exciting week for most of us, rushing to do this and that. luckily the proj module teacher had it's independent marker calling in for sick leave, if not i dont think we would be able to see the daylight after monday. we've to do a presentation next week, followed by a quiz, and den the week after, we'll be having our final presentation and another assignment to be due. of course, not forgetting the other final test that we have to take for XML.

enuff of the stress. i'm trying to turn optimistic. "Things are looking good, arent they?" it's a foolish perception.
btw, i'd taken these several pic that i think would be quite interesting... lol. (i think?)

i see u again, bb.

-My hyper cute Niece! n she shares the same birth date as me! =) -


- i'm eyeing this shirt currently! haha, a bit psychotic to take it, though.-


- Hahas, me and jinling at ... Spotlight! and sorry for my sorry state, my hair hasnt been good that day -


- mom always comments that my smile is so fake. -

New template

Eyy! like the new skin of mine? well! it's the original template of blogger! i like the pink; the way it wraps the content of my stuff, and the way it's organised... it's very unlike my previous skin, though. well, i'm sure that i may b changing skins quite often from now, as i realised the original skins are candy sweet! =)

more skins at: blogSkins. they incorporate thousands and thousands of pretty skins by bloggers themselves, but i had a hard time finding the one i like, cuz they're all so pretty!

okie, okie, concentrate on my e-diary.
woke up at ard 12.45 today, after i heard mom drop the electronic blood pressure kit. den she came and woke me up, saying that i should wake up earlier to clear the mess in the house. =( den, had "breakfast" and surfed the net. realising it was high time to change the skin of my blog, i reluctantly clicked on the "Pick New" hyperlink at the template page. it was den i realised that they had great choices for fantastic looking temps! i think Thisaway Rose and Dots Dark make great choices for blog skins... but i liked mine the best. haha, obvious, whch is why i chosed it.

den jeannie came at ard 4 to do some work on my comp, and i had this impulsive thought that we should watch "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" we watched the show until like, 9+, i dint keep track of the time. i dint quite enjoy it though, cuz i was sneezing my way, and feelng cold and sick inside. i have this hunch that i'm going to get feverish, with the constant mucus flowing outta my nose as if backing up my hunch. but i took my temp, it was perfect. 36.9. not sick. but, duhs. i dunno. mayb something in me is de-functioning.

hahas. but even though i'm sick, i still had some creativity in me. came from nowhere, i had this ridiculous picture and it appeared to look like this: haha! have a good luff!

Jeannie's Bday!

Firstly, i'd like to say a very happy belated birthday to JEANNIE!!! yayyy! we celebrated it for her a day earlier, cuz i was kinda afraid that i have to meet him on sunday, which is her actual birthday(17-07), so jinling suggested to celebrate it with her on sat(16th/july) instead...

first, i met jinling and jeannie at the amk contr. station. the 3 of us wore white tops. den we were speculating if sharon would wear a yellow top or pink top. no. she wore white too!!!

okay, the start of the day, we went Changi Expo to work as a surveyer. but indeed, we failed as we're not cut out to be the position as said. one thing, we're not going to open up to strangers and ask them to help us with our survey, and the other thing is that, shannon(our in charge) is terribly late. and we'll get miserably paid if we still get stuck there, so we decided to call it quits with shannon. den we headed to changi airport, using the smart invention from mr ong teng chiong, the MRT(!!)... this is the pic we took while we're going back and on our way to meet our frens(shiyun-she wore white too!, hweeshan-white!!!!, wendy-yellow =( ) in city hall.. geez. look at the majestic view behind us!

next, we headed to dine at cafe cartel in marina square(ms). i ordered , shiyun ordered as her desert(slurrps!), and jinling ordered softshell crab with blahblahblah. and man, ms do change a hell lot. it's really changed from head to toe, and we have to explore it again and again before we can really know the directions of the shops well!

we then went to pan pac(yes, again again, again!) to take the lift to level 37. this is the pic we took in da lift, stayed there for awhile, explored it's swimming pool when we heard fireworks! damn, it's the NDP rehearsal! hahaha... we were all screaming with joy, and exclaiming how beautiful the view looked. and the ang moh who was swimming in the pool prolly got a shock. he stopped swimming when he heard the bomb-like sounds, in the middle of the pool.

hahs, den next stop will be the ritz carlton hotel. i tell u, they even have this "usher" at the back door and opens the door for ya! man. and we rested our tired feets at their .... i dunno what they call it. it's like the living room of the hotel or some sort. it's def not their lobby, cuz it's located at level 1, but their lobby is at level 3. man. i dunno how to explain, but i hope u get my drift. neways, i went to kaypoh kaypoh at the pool side again, and there's this waterfall just in front of the pool. and i took one pic of it . i wanted to take the pool sight, cuz it's just so pretty, but jinling said i acted like a mountain tortoise. so i decided not to.

hees. btw, i've wrote quite enuff in this post. -yawns- i need to sleep. and check the previous post. i'd added pix to illustrate what i was saying!